20387.) It hurts a lot when you fall in love with the idea of someone. You fall in love with them from a far. And even though they’re real people, so much closer to the Earth, they’re still skyrocketing above you. I want to be with him, with every fiber of my being. But, I know I won’t get a chance. I’ve never really felt like this, and it’s annoying. I don’t want to be a ‘fangirl’, I don’t want to be seen like that. Not for you. I wish I’d be able to be gorgeous, or have a personality that’s suited for you. I wish you didn’t live a whole ocean away. I wish I could take care of you and give you someone who only cares for you happiness. It’ll never happen, and I think, as long as I get to hug you once and let you know how I feel, I can still die with one less regret. Fear keeps me from trying to contact you or write to you, because I don’t want to be a fool, and I don’t want to embarrass you or make you uncomfortable. But, I don’t want to die tomorrow knowing that I didn’t at least try.